This post has adult material & is rated R

I was talking to a neighbor yesterday, yes, one of the mean ones. :D and we were talking about women issues. She said how having a hysterectomy (OMG I just looked up that word to see if I spelled it right & I did :D) is better for women having a lot of problems & that her daughter should of had one a while ago. I said that it can be scary & also I read it can lower your sex drive. Well, this made her laugh & she had to tell her daughter what I said so they could obiviously make fun of me. I do realize that I don't really know much in this area because I don't have these kinds of problems, but I do know that that issue is always brought up on news show & what not, when talking about hysterectomies. But the neighbor & her daughter laughed about sex drive & how that is not something that interest them anymore, anyways.

Well, I think sex drive is very important to have when married to have a healthy marriage & to have a healthy relationship. Plus I think it keeps your mind healthy too! If I go too long, I notice I get cranky & the same with my husband. It has taken a while for me to feel comfortable with my sex drive. As someone who has believed that sex is a bad thing, when growing up, it's hard to think everything is normal & ok with God. God did make us with the urge & true, we need to learn to control it, but it is normal to want to do things with the opposite sex, especially when married.

This got me thinking. Don't most women's sex drive increase when they get older? I have heard it does & I, myself, know mine has. In fact, I find it a little funny how Scott once said that one day I will want it more then him & he won't be that interested. I didn't think that day would come. It did. Studies say that men peak when they are young & women don't peak until much later. It seems very funny that it takes a woman a long time to feel comfortable with her sexuality & guys do so early. You got to wonder if it's a good laugh for God & that is why he made us that way.

I fooled around a little before I met Scott. The 1st guy was my 1st love. I thought I was gonna marry him. I was also more willing to try things & didn't feel it was wrong. We would kiss all the time in public, & I didn't care too much of what others thought. When I met Scott, I all of a sudden, changed. Or matured. He never had a lot of girlfriends. He never had any serious girls before me. He was still a virgin. I felt guilty that I wasn't one, but I was honest with him from the start. He would want to kiss in in public & I would be afraid to. I was too afraid of what people thought. After we were married, he'd get mad at me for that. I would try to change. When it came to sex, well, that was ok behind closed doors, but he wanted it all the time & he wanted me to be just as wanting as him. I was not. I thought 3 times a week was not a bad sex drive, he thought it was not enough. I never denied him & won't, but he wanted me to be the aggressive one sometimes & that just wasn't me, then. What happened to make me be this way is because I had asthma & I did not have it under control. So I couldn't breath right. I got pregnant right off the bat with Marc & my doc at the time told me that I was wrong for wanting to breath while pregnant. He said all the meds are to dangerous for the baby & I was a bad person for wanting to breath. I guess he didn't know that oxygen is good for you & the baby. Stupid Doctor. So I was having trouble breathing & I also thought that wanting to breath normal was wrong & not a serious condition, thanks to that doc, & my Mom for not taking my asthma serious & for Scott thinking it was no big deal. Scott thought if I passed out, I'd start breathing normal. If it wasn't for God, I'd be dead. I had no self esteem & believed everyone else that I was a baby about wanting to breath right. Of course none of these people have asthma. So any hoot, I just saw my doc & it was the weekend so I thought I'd have to wait to see another doc about it on Monday. I still went to work & tried to get by. My lungs were tight, but I was doing it. Then a friend at work, one night, joked to Scott about if he wanted to have sex with me, to go a head & just rush me to the ER when he was done. Well, he didn't think it was a joke, but forgot the part about the ER. He got up the next morning & never checked on me & went to work. I got up when I knew the other doc office would be opened & tried very carefully to go down stairs. I got to the phone & called. The nurse on the phone told me to get to the hospital right away, their office was in the hospital. I called my Mom who lived 20 minutes away, & asked her to drive me. Now this was the only time she took my asthma serious. She came right away & took me, she was really worried. She said I looked blue. I feel this was because I was pregnant with her 1st & favorite grandchild. She was worried about him, not me.:D
I got there & for the 1st, with many times to come, I was told I should have came earlier. Scott Called & insisted on talking to the doc that treated me, before ever talking to me. Why, because he was feeling guilty, NO! Because he was worried about me or the baby, NO! He wanted to talk about sex with the doc & find out directly from him, if I was gonna be able to put out for him. The doc let Scott know that I could still have sex. Now this all happened before he talked to me. So you see how important sex use to be for Scott & how it became less important to me, at that time. That is why I was not Johnny on the spot, ready to jump his bones, when he came in the door, like he wanted.
It took me a long time feel comfortable again. Now I want it 3 times a week & I'm lucky if I get it once a week.:D